at this rate if someone im actually interested in likes me back im going to die of surprise before i even get to make out with them
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
we literally spent four hours convincing you that all 5 of your toes were there. no more everclear on a tuesday.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
so just saw tiger woods pull a page out of his wifes book and hit some kid in the head with a golf club
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
I wonder if her husband knows I have my own drawer at the apartment
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I'm going as your incestuous sister. If thats not the perfect winglady I don't know what is.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
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