I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Funny, I didnt know that facebook statuses were for crappy song lyrics
i was so worried that when his hands were down my pants he was going to find the weed i stole from him
when you agree to fuck a guy it does by NO means make it okay for his roommate to hide in the closet with doritos and watch
His cuteness will no longer contol my vagina
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Just trying to get my dicks in a row.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
what did we do after we left your crib?
you layed down in some rocks for about an hour, you stole some pumpkins, you passed out and started shaking, we got t-bell, we took you back to the dorm.
"I mean like shit happens" should never be an excuse for anything
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
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