There is no way to make a throwing up smiley so just picture it....
it makes me cry that so many people are going to see you naked someday.
a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot
god is laughing at you again
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
She passed out in his mom's bed and when we went to go get her she went 'no its cool I live here'.
I refuse to fuck a guy who needs a coozy for his beer. NOT EVEN IN DESPERATE TIMES LIKE THESE.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I love you man but my hope is that you will not wake me up again by pissing on me
wait you fucked a guy who wears k-swiss? seriously?
I know, im living my 7th grade dream
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
I'm going to use this quarantine time to improve my blowjob skills.
Randomize
