I thought she had more class and brains than to date a complete numb-nut, drug addict, fuck up like him. People never cease to amaze me
omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
Retelling stories from our semester makes me realize we need to get tested for herpes.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
i just wanna get shit faced and pass out in some random holly bush with a bucket on my head and stockings for shoes.
When everyone ask you tomorrow go ahead and tell them I'm the girl that fell of safe ride and was all bloody.
You were petting your bowl of cocoa puffs and shushing it softly while staring at the mirror
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
Congrats on dating a convict, there's no fitbit badge for that one.
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
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