I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
Emily saved me from being trapped on my roof and then I beat her in a race at 5am it was a low key night
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
How naked do you want me to be?
Randomize
