Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
I can't think of anything besides pubic hair fallout. Ugh.
Started with us just having a beer. Now Ivan lit a torch to walk to the store, Ben smashed a 26 in the parking lot, and they're throwing broken shot glasses. Fratio Friday is something.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
Do not ever chug tabasco sauce.
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
Dude, what the hell where you thinking last night
Welllllll basically they were like "challenge" and I was like "accepted"
To potentially get me laid, I need you to send me your favorite memes.
Randomize
