2 v-cards in one night. impossible is nothing.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
How am I?!! The turkey is dry as shit, I'm watching football in low def and there's no beer b/c everyone is in aa. Fuck giving thanks.
Dude you took some guys glasses off his face and ran out of the bar
Do you know why I have a burn shaped like a tiny spork?
Why does my jaw hurt?
I may have punched you.
I just want every freshman guy to know about Grindr just so I can have more options
He went to cum on my stomach and somehow it got behind my ear. He's like a fucking jizz Houdini.
I don't need to know how horny your mother is, hun.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
He got naked after doing the Ice Water Challenge and it was still enormous. So, yeah, I stayed over.
when I walked in the door they were passed out naked, on top of eachother, with tetris controllers in their hands.
I'm worried about us. We are almost 30 and we still drink jaeger bombs till we black out. Wait, no I'm not. I'm excited about us.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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