Is it awkward that I've slept with every guy in this room?
Only if they know about it too.
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
matt and i tucked you in... you REFUSED to move your head from under the bed.
When are you not under some influence?
Since last Tuesday...yesterday.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
They wouldn't let me hang out the sun roof and sing apple bottom jeans in the drive thru of hardee's i think i no longer like these ppl
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Well you got kicked off a stripper pole. They said girls only.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
I was drunk in the shower and i decided to shave. Im now bleeding to death
Randomize
