Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I need you to promise me that the first one to find out our kids smoke weed, takes the weed so we can smoke it ourselves
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
There's a bag in my room with garbage, a thong, fritos, and an electrical cord. I'm assuming it's yours
........yyyyyyeah that's me
Someone is in my phone as "fireball girl" and keeps texting me. How do I go about finding out who it is?
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Woke up this morning with fake blood all over my bed which is a positive considering last year it was all real blood
I think the sex rug burn on my back is infected, can you check it out when you get home?
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
A bitchslap is in order.
Randomize
