If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
This is why I shouldn't be left alone with liquor and anticipation.
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
On that note; HAPPY 21: THE SEQUEL from the back of an ambulance!!
Wait. Did you let me snort wine last night cause I wanted to smell jesus's blood?
Yes. I have pictures. Your soul is mine.
How many trips to the liquor store in a week constitutes alcoholism?
I don't think I can recall what a 23 year old cock felt like if one slapped me in the face.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
Text me later if you aren't dead and wanna have a drink later
Someone just needs to roll me into a blanket burrito and feed me drugs
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Randomize