And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
This chic sharing the cab with me just started givin me head. I'll be an extra 5 minutes.
She jumped on a table and took off her shirt and started yelling things that no one understood. For being 3, she has a dead on impression of a drunk party girl.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I just took a service station dump so foul I had to buy gas out of guilt
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
I need to stop using "I went to the Harry Potter theme park" as my pickup line.
Randomize
