Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
An eyelash just fell out into my container of rice. Searching for it, i took a single piece of rice out at a time coming to the coclusion that i should not be this high while eating rice.
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
Wonderful brian is stoned out of his mind, floating in a lawn chair in the hot tub eating a giant plate of macaroni and staring at the moon
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
I'm pretty sure the Bible says "He who is most sober may cast the first stone."
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
Yeah, but i got vodka and bacon out of it, so it's fine.
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
