My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
Well on a lighter note, guess who just threw up in the elevator
It was like riding a jackhammer on a train during an earthquake. THAT amazing.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Hey Kellie. Me putting. My face intebetaeen ut your boobs made my night
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
I didn't wake up drunk this year...I must be getting soft
Yeah I guess quad-fisting Miller Lites just isn't as effective as it used to be
It's one of the few times I hit fuck it levels of not caring
Randomize
