my iphone just auto-corrected drink to drnknghhhg...
lets put it this way..we'd win on tool academy
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
he had to fake a sneeze attack to hide the fact he came in 15 seconds?!
so its atleast an 8 for creativity.
Why have they been driving around the block for the past 30 min?
He told her it was international road head day.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
You better buy her a motherfucking bunnyrabit to make up for this. And me footsie pajamas for being a cockblock.
We started off talking about nice cuddling and you turned it into fucking with a Santa hat on...
Whenever you have to pee or whatever I'll be over here to harass you
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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