You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
All I want to do is go home, strip down to my pants, get in the shower and pee down my leg
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
Did I crawl through the hotel lobby all the way to our room?
For some reason there are two like 10 year old black girls crumping at the bar. I feel like I'm in a missy elliot video.
Yessssss I diiiiid! I enjoyed 38% of it. There are 4 qualifications and 2 were good. 1. There is a penis in my vagina (Pass) 2. It's a big penis (Fail) 3. The sex is long and exciting and makes me sweat and have 6 pack abs (fail) 4. I got off (uhhh potential to pass...)
OK WHO CHANGED MY RING TONE TO LADY AND THE TRAMP AND CHANGED EVERY CONTACT IN MY PHONE TO 'SOME GUY I FUCKED'?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
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