Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
Blew a line and having a jolly rancher... the day is looking up.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
You disappeared for 10 minutes. Then came back with nothing but your boxers and a life jacket on to tell us we were all screwed when the flood came and you would be the only survivor.
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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