Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
i just realized the only form of arm exercise i get is holding my arms up in the stand up tanning booth
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
Apparently the last thing they remember of me was me stumbing into a bathroom, then falling out 5 minutes later clutching a butter knife repeating "ketamine goes in my face hole"
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I watched you down those shots like a lion cub watching its mother rip apart a gazelle
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
You sat outside petting a picture of your cat for hours... not even the real thing... just a picture.
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