:( I'm sorry!!!
sexual favors sorry?
absolutely not
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
I woke up with a random mailbox in my room with a note that said "this should probably be returned. Happy Thursday!"
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
I SHITYOUNOT DAN JUST PUNCHED A DEER IN THE FACE. MID LEAP.
After closing we did it on every flat surface in the bar. Best use a coaster if you're coming to happy hour today.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
