she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
So I think his penis grew over the weekend. Is that possible or does absence make the dick grow longer?
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Let me get this straight. You stopped mid foreplay to shave your legs?
Um yeah. I wasn't about to shave them if nothing was happening. And I have HBO. It's not like he's the victim here.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
This is your post bachelor party survival text. This a free and complementary service to make sure you are still alive. For alive, say yes. For hurting, say ugh. If lost, say help. If dead, please feel free to not respond. Thank you and we hope you enjoyed the party.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
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