I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
Yeah like at least with a penis what you see is what you get with a vagina there can always be a surprise inside
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
She even gives head with a lisp.
ugh... I can't wait for campus to get back. Then everyone will have other things to try to have sex with besides me.
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
So do you remember the bartender that caught me when I fell off the bar 4 weeks ago? He hasn't been to work since...Woops.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
I did just chug a pint glass of wine during a solid round of masterbation, so I believe I am ready for bingo.
I woke up in a bush somewhere in Tucson with a full suit on. Great way to end my birthday.
Randomize
