we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
There are 3 pics of me on my camera, naked, wearing only an apron, scooping ice cream.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
That chick needs a catscan. And fuck it, we're still ordering in a stripper
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
I've also hijacked your can opener. Sadly not for the same sexual reason as the muddler.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
WHY DOES MY BOYFRIEND'S BROTHER HAVE TO BE SO FUCKING HOT
I hope I didn’t eat too many edibles just now. I got shit to do today. Like make Jell-O shots and take a shower.
Randomize
