im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
Why do girls get to wear clothes that say "do me now" but guys don't have that kind of option?
I mean, what would the male equivalent of a slutty dress be?
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
just scratched off #34 on my list of things to do before age 30 - drunk in a helicopter.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I blacked out after running into my soc TA in the beer garden. came to dancing on the speakers at major lazer and making out with said TA.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
He keeps bees of course he's weird
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
He held my hand in public and I nearly came. Like he needs to be inside of me yesterday.
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
Randomize
