I printed and framed a picture of a seagull shitting, and hung it in my house. I'm waiting to see how long it takes everyone to notice.
question. what would be the least awkward way to ask your one night stand if he came inside of you because you would really prefer not to have his illegitimate lovechild. hypothetically.
bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
Was the mom I hooked up with decently attractive I feel like her two friends were hotter
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
That last one reminds me of the time we smoked that foot-long joint and by the time we'd finished we were so stoned we applauded it.
I made soup. Now I'm having post soup making wine. I had pre soup making wine also.
I'm in the recliner and i have a bottle of wine wedged in my cleavage, drinking from a straw. Clever and classy or pathetic and sloppy?
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