Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
You kept showing the cop the bruises on the bottoms of your feet and claiming you were a medical mystery.
But first time having sex and he went down on me twice?! I'm gonna marry this guy
I'll make sure to include that in my bridesmaid toast
Hahah fuck. I keep looking to make sure that stupid line doesn't show up when my guards are down. Babies can sense fear.
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
Randomize
