I remember asking you "need some dick tonite?"
Yeah I guess to me frat party equals penis party. oh the wonders of vodka.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Sometimes I wonder how you ever made friends then I remember it's because you blew your way to semi-relevance
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
When I tell my children how I survived hurricane Sandy I'll probably leave out the threesome
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
how many people can say they bit their tattoo off?
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
His encouragement of my recreational drug use is the backbone of our nonrelationship. That, and rough animal sex and loud music.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
Randomize
