I just creeped all your pictures on Facebook -- it was like I watched you grow up right before my eyes.
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
I assume you will show your seat mates your vibrating cock ring.
We're on a cock hunt. Everything is fair game.
i'm sad. The beetle crawled away. I was only trying to get him stoned.
I guess birthday shots aren't always the answer
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I am gathering blankets and bags of horse grain to pad my truck bed so I have a comfy place to crash when I get home, without the inconvenience of stairs. Or doors. Or walking. But with the refreshing scent of molasses.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
Randomize
