I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
When the doctor said the anal leakage might not be reversible without some lifestyle changes you start asking if it's worth the entertainment value.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
For whatever reason, whenever she's drunk off Crown, all she wants to do is jerk me off with her feet.
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
How are you supposed to wish the guy you send nudes to good luck for the first day of his new job??
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
Ah you cut my boxers off with scissors, we're way past introductions
Now swiping left on 23-year-olds with abs. Is this adulting?
I just landed at Logan and some guy threw up in the baggage carousel. Boston never really changes
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