STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
so when she was in the shower, I took a pic of my dick with her phone and sent it to her brother saying, this just fucked your sister
i stapled my math hw together with an ear ring, too ghetto?
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
I felt like the hulk waking up from a black out except with munchies
There should be a guide book that probation officers hand out on "how to tell a tinder girl about your ankle monitor before she notices it at the worst possible moment"
All i remember is looking at the bottle vodka that I was drinking and wondering how it was suddenly empty.
That may have had to do with you chugging it
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Why is the turtle in the toilet again?
Well as I was puking in the tub I put him in there to keep me company but I am almost positive the original setup was him in the tub and me next to the toilet...I hope he likes tequila
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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