The pirates hijacked 3 more ships today!!
we need a boat to join in
Obama is on top of it we'd get killed within mins, but we'd live in legend foreva
I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
So like 5 seconds in I realize I knew him in 3rd grade and I went limp in his mouth. It felt like I just murdered the last unicorn ever. Going straight never felt like an option till now.
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
You kept ripping all your clothes off and saying, "Let me be free!"
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I wrote an entire paper in under an hour about The Nightmare Before Christmas. I was also high as shit and pretty sure I dedicated half the page to the animation but still.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
