I'm at work and it's 1:30. I need a beer. is that bad?
Welcome to every minute of my life.
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Omg worst high ever. I'm watching Parks and Rec, and all i can think about is how andy, leslie, and tom are my closest friends. Forever alone.
Randomize
