My e-date is really photogenic. Real-life not so much
the red, white, and blue power rangers were all also in the porn buisness, good bye childhood
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
He doesn't fuck you and he's married, why do you keep letting him cum all over your stomach?
In the hopes he'll just put it in one day?
this kid is using one arm to help his buddy with a keg stand, and the other arm to hold up the chick he's making out with.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
I said "sucks to suck" to a cop last night. We've been snapchatting.
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
How do you say happy birthday to someone you fuck occasionally that almost got you arrested? Like what do I text.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
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