Grow some girl-balls and come out already
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I need you to help me convince Steph that she will like Tequila if she would chase it with A-1
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Apparently we carried the stove upstairs. I Woke up with it in my room.
I still maintain we were not that drunk......
Dude, Dimensionally it doesn't even fit in that stairway! We might have to knock a wall out to get it back down!
I got my period during my acid trip. It was weird.
You were trying to be sexy by spraying your contact solution on your chest and telling me to lick it off
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
Randomize