Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
i'm sorry, i thought "hey, she wants TO FUCK YOU" was a good enough cue
it glows. i had to have it.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
there isn't one for "I'll give you an I'm sorry blowjob" but that's also an option you have. in the meantime here is an emoticon of a caterpillar
I woke up to find my purse full of puke, and all I could think was not again.
Do you think if 10 year old us knew that we would be passing out in a McDonalds after a hefty night of drinking, and 23 McChickens, they'd change anything?
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
Just found out I made out with the 40 year old Captain of the boat at the barge party. On the bright side he let me drive the boat so at least there's that.
I just masturbated in the tanning bed stoned. Best decision of my life
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
