he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
He left a cum stain in the shape of a heart on my sheets.
He's like the Bob Ross of love stains.
Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
MTV running anti-sexting commercials is a slap in the face to everything our generation has accomplished.
Thinking about bringing a vibrator to the tanning bed...kill two birds with one stone right?
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
This is classic penis vs brain.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
I am talking to a naked lesbian about robots. I think this means I win life.
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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