i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
weed salsa. i deserve a nobel prize
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
the ladder is at the bottom of the pool
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
He thought my hair would soak it up. I HAD TO CUT IT OFF.
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
i feel sensations at the ends of my beard. Either I am super high. Or my face has accepted my beard and I completed my transformation to Mecca
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
Randomize
