in pain and im wearing pink underwear
so?
i dont own pink underwear
You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
did you fuck him yet?
hahaha who do you think your talking to.. a nun?
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I tried exercising today. I ended up masturbating to the Wii fit trainer.
I am going to be fat forever.
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Randomize
