That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I'm wayyy too drunk to be in a parade right now
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
Let me just inform you of my purse contents right now. Three cum rags, a sock full of cum, xanax, and a fake moustache. This is my life.
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
I just woke up entirely naked on top of a pile of some guy's laundry on his bedroom floor.
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
