if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
don't worry about the neighbors I'm like 99% sure all that snow covered a good portion of our vomit
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
I woke up naked in my own vomit. Not even in my bed. No one is happy.
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
I'm just here to guide your spirit, avoiding herpes is on you though
i was drinking at the bar last night with a guy with no bottom teeth, wearing zubas and a polka dotted hat. if that isn't the definition of wisconsin, i dont know what is
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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