im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Handcuffed. To. Steering. Wheel. Fuck.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
He sent me a 7 minute voicemail of him playing wonderwall on the acoustic guitar I'm not even kidding did he seriously think that would work
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
party at the soccer house. crumbs in my sexy panties. can't. put. pieces. together.
Randomize
