help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
his pick up line was "wanna get a pizza and fuck?"
did it work
that's not the point...
I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
Just wana tell you im wearing assless jorts tonight. Ive been waiting my whole life for this.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
We got kicked out of the ice rink last night for drinking and checking strangers... but they let us keep the beer
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Randomize
