what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
My costume is made up of 4 inch heels and a firefighter costume I'm borrowing from the dramatic play area of my Pre-K classroom. I told you I could still be slutty on a teacher's salary.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
Hey please buy toilet paper today. Plastic grocery bags are starting to hurt now
I yelled out look at all those hickeys. And then gave her boyfriend a high five
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
His brother just asked him in all seriousness if it would be cool if they became eskimo brother brothers.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
Turns out both me and my grandpa have a guilty pleasure for South American men.
i tried to break up pigeon sex because one looked too young to consent. fireball feminism ftw
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
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