He didn't know it yet but he was about to go down on me.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
last night we were having sex and i didn't care if i got off. i was just holding up my hand behind his head so i could look at my new ring. i think he knew.
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
ARE YOU GOING TO SACRIFICE YOUR LIFE FOR MCDONALDS HASHRBOWNS
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
Is this making any sense, because I’m puking and trying to be Philosophical right now
Randomize
