in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
my grandma just told me that size does matter, and don't let anyone tell you anything different.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
On a scale of one to everyone dying I say let's aim for a 7
In need of cum proof mascara. Don't judge me.
Remind me to switch to jello when you decide to do shots off my ass. It's so much easier to clean than this pudding.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
Last night was a whirlwind of vodka - induced emotion
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
ok first of all what the fuck
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
