Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
weddingsv make me drug and hornr
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
I'm officially my mother.. Smoking in the garage pretending to take the dog out in a big ugly jacket
yeah my parents were only ten feet away and we somehow managed to do it in five different positions without them noticing
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
There was an Altoids can full of urine in the bathroom. I do not want to know what was going on in there.
it's just weird to think of you as a teacher since ive seen you throw up raspberry bacardi in my parents house
all a girl really needs is a few good pair of leggings and a drug dealer that delivers.
I want Walter White to make me a bologna sandwich while I'm chained to a support
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I love you but I don't want to see you naked.
I'd rather explain to the cops why I'm naked than why I'm drunk.
Randomize
