Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Was this before, or after you took my brand new bag of shredded cheese, and "Made it rain"?
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Eating my shrimp pasta on the porch with a 40, wearing a Hawaiian shirt, proclaiming "I GOT SCRIMPS." I just jumped the shark of college.
I told him that his face would look perfect between my legs. One of my most successful strategies yet.
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
EVERYBODY CALM YOUR SHIT
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
He’s older
Like “has a job and pays his bills” older or “still watches porn on DVD because he can’t figure out the Internet” older?
Randomize
