Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
nothing like celebrating the fact that you're not a father by trying to impregnate other women
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
he broke into my appartment and left me a waffle maker...
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
to have them in my mouth would be like meeting a unicorn while floating on a cloud of glitter
Be my booze princess bebe. I'll rescue you from the lame tidings you are confined to up in the sober castle.
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
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