im so drunk with asians
where?
always
She's like Mona Lisa when she's intoxicated. No one understands her but they all think she's marvelous
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Remember when we had a keg, and then another 5 cases... and like 30 people drank it all?
Everything hurts.
I feel like we need a drunken piñata bash with your face being the piñata and my hopes and dreams being the stick
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
Apparently fireball doesn't mix well with my no carb diet
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
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