i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
So im going to watch Hocus Pocus in my footie pajamas... How am I in college?
You just kept screaming "You are no House!!!" at the ER doc trying to stitch your head
When she e-mailed me back asking for proof, complete with hospital intake records, I just told her it was a home-birth. I'm prepared to take the fail.
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
I have random bruises including my spine and visible bite marks on my neck. Thanksgiving car sex accomplished.
i woke up soaking wet with shard of glass imbedded in my flesh dangerously close to my dick what happend?!!
BEER BOTTLE SWORD FIGHTHING!!
How much money would it take for the bouncer to get us beers while we wait in line to get in?
$450 apparently whoopwhoop
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
There's a fly in my room repeatedly throwing itself at my window, and I feel it's really symbolic of what I want to do with my future
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
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