if your phone is working sorry i called you at 2am. if it is not then i never called your phone at 2am
craigslist faux pas number 857, just got head in a disability bus.
Just found the video that explains the neighborhood applause. Your landlord is awesome, and the clothes are on the roof
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
I'm going as Jenn Sterger if she answered Favre's calls and ended up in a trash can. If I don't get laid tonight I'm going to be pissed
I think the best part was when you jumped over me naked.
Before attempting to fly away into the night you asked me to take care of your sister. I agreed.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
We fucked, she finished, high fived me, the pulled a celebratory pack of gushers out of her purse for each of us. I'm going to marry your sister dude.
If my emotions are below a 3 or above a 7, I'm crying
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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