Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
The bartender just started bringing me gin and tonic in a pint glass to save himself trips...
I really want to go out tonight but part of me wants to be able to honestly tell the judge tomorow that I didn't
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Just got caught staring at a woman breast feeding. My only response was, "She's so adorable".
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
I stood on the corner waiting to be picked up, dry heaving, and trying to block out the sun.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
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