Bc you can definitely buy condoms if ur a 14 year old girl
what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
So is there some kind of punch card you and I get to use every time we fuck a chick with a cast?
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
Toppless hop-scotch needs to become a competitive sport
I sent him a cookie cake that said "Congratulations you're not a father"
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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